"This too shall pass". Last Thursday, I thought I had my first day off in 3 weeks, but no, lawyer and aid both called to spend 5 more hours with lawyers and understaffed banks. I try really hard to limit my stress, as it is a trigger for my CPTSD, but it took me down for a day. Another Garfield Blue Monday, with plenty of pain and distress to go around. Not a good day to go live with music, and I'm only about an hour out of the bathroom, as I get ready for today's show.
Thus far in my life, my body always seems to bob out of the deep, and I can make it to the shore. My fears are irrational and invisible and little on this round rock causes me fear, but fear chemicals know my bloodstream, and impact my day to day journey. I do not do drugs, never have intentionally taken a prescription other than first generation antibiotics related to poor teeth. My family has universally bad reactions to modern chemistry, 5 kids and two parents that all had side-effects from their prescribed medications, my reactions were all before my 18th birthday, as I then had authority over my body. So my inspirational thought is that the human body has an auto pilot, better than human direction, this autopilot will almost always take us through infection and injury. The better the health of the plane, the easier the landing. For me, a diagnosis is not cause for medication, but an awakening of something going wrong in the maintenance department and ground crew. I still aim for 100, with wits remaining. Only time will tell, but its looking better every month.
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